So since my big win I have been playing more steps. I have been running slightly below expectation. That is I am barely showing profit as far as the cost of the steps go. But all is good. Technically I haven’t really spent any money yet. Because a week or two ago I managed to final table a multi-table-tournament. That was good enough to boost my BR another 1k.

I am happy with the way my bankroll is turning out but my luck has really got me feeling down in these steps. Then today I saw a video at PokerRoad that made me crack up and feel all better (since I definitely feel like I can relate).  I am sure all poker players have felt this way at one time or another. 

Beware HIGH level of profanity:

After I won that step 6 I talked about last post I have been contemplating what to do.  What games should I play now that I have a pretty healthy poker bankroll?  Well, I decided to re-invest a big chunk back into the steps.  It seems like a logical choice since I have already proven they could be profitable.

Then I just kinda had a “duh” moment.

If I am going to be investing this money into my ability to profit off of the steps, I might as well try to get as much bang for my buck.  On PokerStars there are basically four different types of currency.  You have play money for those that don’t want to play for real money.  Then you have three real money currencies:  dollars ($), tournament dollars (T$), and world series dollars (W$). 

You receive T$ and W$ by winning satellites into bigger tournaments and later unregistering from that respective tournament.  T$ can be used to enter any tournament or sit-n-go on PokerStars.  While W$ can be used on PokerStars for any tournament that is a satellite for a live event such as the World Series of Poker.  W$ can also be used for the WCOOP, which is a series of poker tournaments PokerStars holds every year.  It is like the online version of the WSOP.

Do I have you confused yet?

Well, it is actually all pretty simple once you get a hang of things.  But here is where all this mumbo jumbo gets interesting.  You can trade W$ and T$ for regular old cash.  Each has a varying price dependent upon the demand.  Usually you can buy or sell W$ in the range of 90-95% of the true money value and you can do the same for T$ for about 98-99% of the true money value. 

So what does this mean? 

If you know you are going to be playing tournaments, why the heck don’t you buy T$?  It may not be much but the $1 off of $100 might add up over time.  Even more so when talking about W$ ($5 off of $100).

That is what I just did.  Since W$ works for the steps I just bought W$ 500 for $470.  That 30 dollars I saved is enough for nearly 5 more step 1′s, and who knows one of those step 1′s might turn into another package worth over 10k.

Now there are multiple sites out there trying to get your business when it comes to all these different currencies.  They will buy at a price usually lower than what they will sell essentially screwing you out of money in the long run.  I say you just cut out the middle man and go to a forum where others are looking to do the same thing, buy or sell W$ or T$. 

There is a great forum marketplace over at 2+2 that does just this.  Check it out, what do you have to lose!

Back in October ’07 I set out to reach an online bankroll level of 10k. I knew I could do it, it was just a matter of learning that one dire lesson that seems to be vacant in my poker repertoire. That lesson is bankroll management.

I set this goal after losing over 2k in about a week’s time. At the time, it was the highest that my online bankroll had ever been. It took about 3 months to build, and in a blink of an eye it was gone.

So I deposited $100 with the intent to never go broke again. At the same time, I was set on trying to start building a bankroll and see if I can’t make some serious money playing online poker.

It has now been a year since the start of this goal. When I first started the goal, I honestly thought it would take anywhere from 8 to 16 months since I am not a high-volume player. However, I definitely thought I would be further along than I am now. Below is a graph of how my BR has fared since starting this goal of mine:

Starting at $100 I reached 1k in a little more than a month’s time. I was well on my way, then I hit one of many bad patches. I battled on though, and hit 2k by around the 3 month mark. I would eventually hit my high point of just over $5,000 in the 7th month.

Then I went on deadly tilt during and after my trip to Vegas in June. I was chasing losses, playing poorly, and running bad all while playing levels that would actually require me to have a bankroll of over 20k to truly withstand the swings. It was a combination that could be the end-all for many of poker players. Eventually I snapped out of it, and I started this blog here.

Since starting this blog, I have had my highs and lows, and again was still playing outside of my bankroll. Then I finally hit a point to where I was at a level where I had reached just 1 month into this goal, the 1k mark. I took a break, and have played a couple times since then, but overall just haven’t played hardly at all as my motivation is just not there.

It has been a really disappointing ride thus far, but I am not giving up. I will reach my goal, just not as soon as once hoped or personally expected.

Well, as I said before in the last post, I would be playing the PL Draw WCOOP event. I took the W$ that I had and took the risk. After about 7 hours of trying to play a game that I am really unfamiliar with (since limit draw is really more my forte), I came in 67th out of 1024. It was good enough for me to cash for a little more than double the buyin ($215).

Sigh, but it is bittersweet. I really played well up into the money, then I made a few mistakes when we had about 100 people left. I was then left on life support by time we were down to 80 people. The majority of my downfall was due to a new bigstack moving to my table and absolutely running everyone over.

I tried to make a stand a couple of times, and when I did he had outdrawn me. The guy was not only being ridiculously aggressive, but he was getting hit by the deck as well. A deadly combination. I wasn’t the only one to fall to him. I must have seen him knock out 9 people in about an hour, which is a ton considering the tournament structure and the fact that we are playing 6 handed.

All I can do is tip my hat though, and move on. Speaking of which, it is time to go back to the grind. My BR is now at $1061.72 plus about 50 dollars in W$ left. I am unsure what I will do with that W$, I guess I will just hold on to it for next year’s WSOP steps or something. I don’t really want to sell it, since you never get full value.

As for the games I plan to be grinding out, it will be mostly dependant on my BR level. I set up a spreadsheet that will factor in Fox’s article, and Kelly Criterion. As of right now, I can play 1/2 limit games, .25/.50 NL, MTT’s that are no more than $15, and SNG’s that are no more than $20.

Speaking of Fox, who is also a PokerXFactor pro, have you seen the e-magazine put out by him and Hatfield13, another PXF pro? It is called Blind Straddle, and it really is a good read. It has articles from a number of highly respected poker pros who are also some extremely talented writers I might add.

Outside of that, it is time to hit the tables again. I am excited to be playing again and hopefully my extended time away will pay off.

Let me start this post off with a bang. My poker account on stars is now down to $1035.74. That is a loss of over 75% of my bankroll since my post dated on August 17th.

I sit here and honestly don’t know what to say. In the past I would write something smart and feel like it was a good excuse. This time, I am just not going to make an excuse. I am really disgusted with my poker playing right now that I have decided to take a small break.

I guess if there was to be a good week to take a break, this would be it. I just recently had my wisdom teeth pulled, and I have kind of been in and out of it. I really should of had them pulled years before, but they just never bothered me.

Back to the topic at hand, I feel as though I have a good grasp of many different poker variants. But obviously something is not connecting with me.

My Official Poker Ranking shows that I am now a profitable MTT player, though this was not necessarily the case as recently as 6-8 months ago. Though notice that my most profitable game is under the “other” category due to the limit 5 card draw MTTs I have played in the past. I also believe this to be the case due to the large field sizes in the NLH mtts and I really haven’t had what I consider a big “payday” to give me that great of an ROI.

My Sharkscope is much of the same, proving that I must be doing something right. In fact, the only game that I believe I have a -ROI in when it comes to my Sharkscope is the Turbo 180 man SNGs, though I have a really good ROI in the regulars.

One thing that I have to note about both my OPR and my Sharkscope is that it really isn’t enough games for me to make a solid evaluation of my game. I have never really been much of a high volume player. Yet, I do believe if anything, my SNG numbers are pretty close, and my MTT numbers are actually behind when it comes to my true potential.

So where is the problem? It must be cash games right? Well when it comes BB/100 hands in nearly every game I frequent, I am a profitable player.

The true problem is when I hit a skid in the road. I play WAY over my BR and this is where I compound errors to be left with a less than stellar amount in the Cashier. It is like an avalanche that has become out of control. One thing brings on the next, and then I look up and realize that I just don’t know what I am doing anymore.

Now I have had many stints of jumping up levels before my bankroll was truly ready. When I really get burned is when I jump up to chase losses or when I am tilting. When I have jumped up in the past due to my knowledge of the competition or the edge I feel I have in a game, I have done pretty well. In fact, that is where I made my last run from 2k to 4k in 5 card draw.

I really just wish I could jump up to a limit today where I could compete for what I consider to be good money. Playing at the lower levels seems to bore me. I like to play against the best and at the best levels. This is my competitive desire coming out.

Am I the only one to get in a rut like this? No. In fact, it seems recently I have seen alot of “pros” and highly talented players complaining about being on a losing streak, some longer than others. It almost kind of worries me, because if they can’t make a profit, then how can I expect to? Is there really any type of a future in poker for me? Could there ever be a day where the whole playing field is so leveled out that nearly no one will be able to make an income from just playing poker?

Those are questions I can not answer, nor should I even attempt to at this point. But what I can do is answer the the question that I titled this post with. What is missing? What is holding me back?

After some long hard looks at my game (though with plenty of mistakes) I have come to the conclusion that there really isn’t much missing in my game for me to have not already reached my goal to 10k by now…..Instead it is too much of something……EGO!

I need a reality check and realize that I am only as good of a player as by how much money I make at this game. Everything starts with me, and I have to fight myself just to get to the next level. Poker really is a humbling, self-evaluating game that seems to always throw you a curveball when you are looking dead red fastball.

For the next couple of days, I plan to still keep evaluating my game and continue to brush up via videos and books. I will come back a better player and I am looking forward to it.

Sorry it has been so long since my latest post entry. This past week has truly been one of the craziest I can remember in a long time. My bankroll has been on a roller coaster ride, with it ending up down.

After writing my last post about goal setting, I have actually found that I have a wrong outlook. Yes, it is good to have an overall goal right now to reach a bankroll level of 10k, but shooting to win 100 a day is not the best idea.

I have found myself winning $250 dollars in a quick 1 hour session then quiting for the day, feeling good about my play. Win another $150, and quit…..so on and so on.

Then it happens, I hit variance. Nothing seems to be going right. I am not getting dealt any hands at all, and when I do get dealt a playable hand, it always seems to be second best. When this happens, I go on tilt just waiting for my luck to go back to at least normal.

Before I know it, I will have lost what I have worked so hard to win in 2 weeks times. Easy come, easy go.

So after speaking with some players in which games I truly respect, I have taken a different outlook, especially when it comes to cash games. I don’t need to have the outlook of trying to win a certain amount during a session, rather my goal should be to put in a certain number of hours.

If I am a profitable player, the wins will come as long as I put in the hours.

So to talk about the past week, my BR got up to just over $4,500, even after losing a ton in the WCOOP steps due to some pretty poor push/fold situational luck. At this time, I was making up for the lack of results in the WCOOP steps with 5/10 and 10/20 limit 5 card draw cash, and 3/6 limit holdem (6 max).

Then on Tuesday night, everything turned for the worse. I found myself in a rut that I just couldn’t get out of. After a quick $100 profitable session in limit 5 card draw, I sat out for a bit to come back to find my luck turn for the worse. It wasn’t just 5 card draw, my limit holdem game took a hit as well.

After about 5 hours of chasing my losses I found my BR at the level it is today, $2844.

This has been known to happen with me in the past, but I truly feel that if I can have a hourly volume goal rather than a daily monetary goal, I can help make sure this type of thing doesn’t happen again.

I can not let this bother me. I need to keep my head straight and continue working hard for my overall goal. So until next time, I am hoping to put in more hours at the virtual felt.